suda akari

Useless News: Reika is missing edition.

Sooooo… this is me and Yuki attempting to write about Useless News while Reika is out having a life. Uh, so… let’s give this a go and see what happens.

Here’s what we decided: each of us would write about something useless in Reika’s absense. Yes, I know, it’s not quite the same, is it? Hopefully our regularly scheduled program will continue again next week. Sorry for the inconvenience folks!

Useless News, according to Jerry

While I don’t quite have the … “panache” that a certian-someone-else does, but here’s my try at describing whatever qualifies as “useless news” these days.

As you know, I really, really like the AKB 1/149 Renai Sousenkyo video game. I guess I am just nostalgic about older times, what with the slew of graduations lately. I’m evening debating a “Throwback Thursday” type of series for this site, but am still thinking about it.

My useless contribution today is: looking back at old times. There are two things I’ve been thinking about lately.

First: Shimazaki Haruka. I must admit that I really like her (though I wouldn’t consider her my oshimen). I came across this picture of her from waaaaaaaay back:

shimazaki haruka teddy bear
That is a huge teddy bear!

Good god, she was quite a cutie back then.

Speaking of things from the past, I sometimes wonder about members who seemed primed as “ace” for the next generation, but kind of fell by the way side.

Case in point? Miyazaki Miho. Here’s a photo of Miho and Sasshi together on AKBingo:

miyazaki miho sashihara rino

Miyazaki Miho was already part of Team A while Sashihara was still a “research understudy” (kenkyuusei)!  But seeing them together is now relatively rare nowadays.

It’s funny how things change, isn’t it?

Useless News, according to Yuki

I would not consider myself the biggest idol fan here, but it is certainly an interest that has some overlap with my general interest in Japanese pop culture. While what I consider “useless news” may not fall under the general theme of this site’s Useless News series, here is what I’ve got for you.

As you know, my most recent contributions to this site center around direct translations of curated 2chan threads. I try to pick threads which I feel are worthwhile to translate but, as is often the case with internet threads, some are a bit raunchy and downright silly!

One such thread is: are there girls [in the 48-groups] who have stinky breath? If that does not qualify as useless, I am not sure what does! A summary of some of the comments are as follows, for the undeniably curious:

  • Matsumura Kaori
  • The smell of old man otaku’s drowns out any stinky breath
  • Kojiharu
  • Stinky breath is a treat!
  • Girls who drink coffee have bad breath
  • Takajo Aki

Take this all with a grain of salt of course, but hopefully this passes the rigorous qualification of “Useless News”?!

Edit: Don’t worry about Reika. She is fine, just busy with other things. Don’t mean to make anyone worry. Thanks guys!

Author: jerry

Sometimes editor. Sometimes translator. Mostly a proofreader. I like Japan and things.

  • Jack

    Yeah I remember Miho. She was in the senbatsu for River and then went downhill from there. So sad

    • Yes 🙁 I wonder if she’ll make a ranking in this years election?

  • Derek Vasconi

    You two did a great, great job! I do miss Reika san’s amazing penchant for finding hysterically useless news, but still, bravo bravo!
    So the Paruru picture is amazing. I wish it was more wider because I think I would make my desktop wall paper. It’s from a better, less saltier time in her life, perhaps?
    The Miho downfall is rather sad to me. I liked her a lot, but at the same time, her personality simply isn’t as large perhaps as other girls who have kind of the whole package going on. Like Yuko chan, or Acchan, or Sasshi. But that doesn’t mean the Mad Dog wasn’t and still is a favorite of mine. Seeing her on the Chaos stage the other night was pretty fun. She still is a lovely face to have in AKB.
    The 2ch translation comments about Kojiharu, Kaotan, and Akicha were eyebrow raising. I would think Akicha wouldn’t, but I have no reason to back up why I think this? Kaotan, yeah, I could see it, and Kojiharu I think would just because there was that old story about her room being really trashy. She was like the Tani Marika of the 1st gens when it came to dirty rooms. So maybe she can’t ever find her toothpaste and that’s why? Lol.
    Good job guys! Now, um, if Reika san could just, um, come back….

    • Haha, thanks, we tried. I guess two of us make one Reika. Such is life!

      I always like to think that there’s some weird unexpected side to each girl. So, I want to believe that Kaotan has perfect smelling minty fresh breath; and that someone like Acchan or Jurina would be on the funky side. Hahaha.

      • Derek Vasconi

        I was kidding guys for sure :). You did a lovely job! Also, I love that there is something different to each girl. I think AKB needs to focus on the more quirkier girls in order to survive themselves in the oncoming years. Feel free to stop over my blog at and read my latest blog entry: THE FUTURE OF AKB. I think you guys would really enjoy it! It’s kind of in keeping with what you just wrote here, in a weird way.
        Thanks again and I can’t wait for Reika san to return 🙂

  • Payuyu Fortyeight

    The sasshi and miho one was on point, yea looking at that picture…life sure has lots of surprises huh :O also, that paru pic lol yea she was still so young in that pic how nice 😀 but kojiharu? smells? omg lol nah

    • Oh yes, young Paruru was quite the cutie. And maybe Miho will rank this year? The impossible can happen!

  • reika


    • Haha, you’re welcome.

      • reika


        • Alright, we’ll be waiting for a proper Useless News segment again soon 😀